I'll never be able to fully forgive myself for the things I've done, no matter how the situation also frames me as a victim. My guilt didn't make my targets less dead. And my remorse wasn't enough to allow me to stop. I can't even really lie and claim that I thought I was secretly a hero.

So no, I'd never declare my past dead, that's an insult to those I hurt. It's a fundamental part of me. Or say I'm somebody else just because I don't like myself much. I am Ava. And I am Ghost. But I like to think I'm at least... a better version of me, here. Than where I started. And I think you can figure that out too. It's just a... very shitty, painful process.

But if you were to kill me. Right now. Not just until tomorrow, but completely. Would you miss me, even a little bit?