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[sailmods]

GAL FRIDAY:


THE CAPTAIN:


unless he likes you then it's more like

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PIRATE JENNY GUABANCEX JENNY:

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[sictransitgloriamundi]

[EVEN LONGER SIGH]

George. Washington. Who.

[gnighteverybody]

Have you seen Abe Lincoln anywhere around here? I thought he just came by.

[ Braces for throttling- ]

[sictransitgloriamundi]

[. . .]

You live. Today. I wouldn't push my luck.

[gnighteverybody]

Wowza, they weren't kidding that this voyage just buttered you up.

[ Leans against nothing, ]

So what's the angle- false sense of security? Turning em against each other? The Hiram bit again?

[sictransitgloriamundi]

Did you miss the last part of what I said.

[gnighteverybody]

No, I just figured you were calling for a premature end to this set. Didn't even get to do the frog at the bank joke.

[ Sighs, ]

Why these clowns and not us? I mean- Jakey? Lil' Matilda and El? None of them worth softening up for?

[sictransitgloriamundi]

No.

[gnighteverybody]

Ask a stupid question, [ He sighs, his ears drooping to either side of his head. ]

You know I'm not happy about being called on for an encore performance either. But the audience wants what they want, don't they, buddy.

[sictransitgloriamundi]

The wheels of fate are turned by hands far above my own. [cocks head] But, you do know all about that.

[gnighteverybody]

Yeah, and I'm not meant to tell anyone else, because that's 'fourth walling'. Not like you can't see 'em if you look that way- [ Gestures over his shoulders at the empty seats of the live studio audience. Sorry kids, he can't do living things here. ]

I guess I just always thought it was a pity. Y'know. You're the only other person I've met who gets it. I always hoped somehow we could be friends. [ This is a threat. ]

[sictransitgloriamundi]

What a coincidence. I always hoped you would become a throw rug.

[gnighteverybody]

What, like this?

[ He's a Yakko-skin rug now. It doesn't stop him talking. ]

Pity your sense of interior decorating is better than your sense of humour. I really think I give this vague nebulous space in front of the bridge some character.